I have read the Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, again, today. I read it in like 3 hours. ANd aferwards i tried thinking about my personal legend. For those few (i hope) that didn’t read this awesome book your personal legend is about the thing you want to do most in life. The thing you dream off and if u dare go after it. I hadn’t read “The secret book” or seen the film, but i guess it the same principle from what i heard. Believe in yourself, believe in the Universe to work with you to achieve your dreams.And the most important thing is not to give up,ever. Never stop dreaming . All the beings in this world are linked and written by the same hand, therefore if u wish for something so bad that u are able to actually go for it the soul of the world will help u achieve it.I like the concept and i had read enough in my young years to know you have to want something to get it. It’s like that line in Sucker Punch: “If you don’t stand for something you will fall for everything”. I think it;s very inspiring, you have to be able to see what you want so you can actually get it. “Visualize, believe” like good Connor MacManus says in BDS:All Saint’s Day. I have encountered this way of thinking in a lot off successful ppl so they have to know what they are saying. But i think the most important and difficult thing is to know what you want. I have been thinking all day what my personal legend is. What should i pursue? And the thing is i just can’t see it. In the book they say u realize what your biggest dream is when you are young because u are more open to listen to your hearts voice. But mine has been silenced.
When i was a young girl i just wanted to work with books because i loved them so much, the stories that helped my bittersweet childhood pass easier were so dear to my heart. But know that i am 23 , finished college, economics, bleah…Now i’m at that point when i have to find a job , provide for myself, start living my dreams. But i can’t. I can’t find a job that i would enjoy working. I can’t see anything. No opportunities. Have i gotten so lazy that i am not willing to work anymore? Have i gotten so sad about life that i lost my will to live it? The best advice i ever got is not to dwell in the past. Live for the present, not the future. If u plan your hole life u won’t be able to live it until u get all your plans done and that could take years. So live for now. Easier said than done. Now, what am i doing now. I’m sitting in my bed, a little sad, with my notebook on my lap tipping and hoping to find my meaning in life.The most enjoyable moment in my day today was the little coffee(it was actually little) i drank this morning after wakening up for nothing. I had something like an interview but couldn’t find the location so gave up. I’m used to giving up lately.I wanted to go to gym afterwards so went to have a cofee until i had my gym appointment. I went to a near by coffee place i always fancied (i’m so british, well i’m european after all). It;s kind of an artist place with posters on walls and rock fm on the radio. My kind off place until i started losing my personality and started doing what normal ppl do. i was alone so i did what i always do, wrote something in my little notebook i carry in my bag. i felt at peace. I miss this kind off places so much.I miss my old rock friends. There were a bunch of teenagers there , it was 10 am and they were drinking beer. Reminded me off the old days when i used to skip school and go to a coffee shop, but i drank hot chocolate. I was always to nice. I so miss those times, i have to remember to dream again. What should i dream about. Yes i want to be a writer but i don;t have enough trust in myself. I never finish anything i start. SHould post some off my ideas to know what ppl think about them. I just want to find myself again. Where did i go, when did i lost myself? Somewhere in college i guess. To busy to get my hearth torn a part and work a lot i forgot what my goals were.I have to find them again. I want them back. I want to be happy again. I want to be able to smile more than an ironic smile or some fake laugh from some stupid movie( they don’t make comedies like they used to, i don;t think gross stuff is funny and here i mention Due Date, didn’t like it a lot,was expecting more)Hmm i guess i can write a whole novel about my personal legend. Hope i will nail it and write about how i got to live it. Hope i will. This is my weeks assignment for myself.Decide what you want and then get it. It’s that easy but i’m afraid that something easy is also something bad. We are so used to get everything the hard way we forget there is an easy way.Like waiting for the job you want/like. I am such a child to think i should like where i work . I don’t want my first real job to be something i hate. i just hope for the best. Positive thinking. We are what we think we are and we are the only ones that stand between us and Happiness.Believe that u can be a better person, believe in love. Love is so important we don’t even realize how much we miss it until we have it. To love your job, your mom, your dad, your shirt,your cat, your friend, your phone, your cousin. Just love. Why is something so simple being turned in something to hard to get? Because we think it’s not good if it’s not worth fighting for it.But why should we fight for something we are entitled to have. God destined us to love, we can think so we can feelings therefore we must love. Human nature is destructive but also creative. Simplicity was lost when money were invented. Have more, be more not love more. It’s sad that we have forgotten our essence of being.The human is an animal that needs to socialize to be happy, wrong, all we need is love. Really! If u love yourself more u won;t let any bastard be mean to you and be unhappy. I think all feelings come from love or rather the lack off love. i want to be a better person and i want to be me again. The sweet girl that thought she can save the world.I just have to save myself now, cause i lost myself and i need to find me again. SO i can remember what my legend is and were to find it and what decisions to take to get there. Wish me luck!
Arhiva categoriei 'Suflet'
Presonal Legend
Paulo Coelho-Valkyries
This book is amazing. I read it in about 4 hours, and it changed my life forever.I recommend reading the book before reading my post, makes more sense;)) I can’t believe how stupid we really are, ignorant. I took pride in my not truly believing in God , but deep down i always believed, but my sadness told me that this can’t exist because i was to unhappy and he didn’t help me. I was waiting to see my miracle. When actually i was the one not helping myself. I always wanted for the things to end bad in my life so i can complain. I convinced myself that i don’t deserve to be happy, i wanted it a lot, but never let myself achieve it. I can’t believe i was the one making my life miserable. And now i say it as clear as water in my cup. I was the one saying and hoping for the bad. I used to say to myself that i was only expecting the worst to prepare myself from disappointed, but didn’t realize i was creating the disappointment. And i was letting myself leaded by my idea of misfortune . I never believed in good, hoped but never let it sink in.I know the most important thing for me in life is to love and be loved , i love my family more than anything yet i try to keep my distance from that feelings because i am so afraid to loose them, i am so afraid that i don’t let myself enjoy the feeling of love, the fact that they love me a lot and feel the same way. I always felt so alone, and now i realize i made myself alone. My ideas of sadness made me feel so alone. I can’t believe i’m saying this but i believe in my Guardian Angel. I didn’t gave him credit, although i am 23 and never happened anything to me. Know i now that my ANgel told me to take that unexpected turn when that weird man was following me. I am shocked , I felt his malice and his will to harm me, but couldn’t just turn away, and my Angel told me to take that unexpected turn and got away, i am stunned. I was wondering where did that come from? I guess i helped my ANgel keep me safe, but not happy. I made myself so unhappy. I know it sounds nuts but this book is so awesome. I learned so much about life.
It’s about the mag’s quest to get in touch with his ANgel, wich he does eventually. The thing that shocked me is that it’s so easy to remember Him, your ANgel, and realize his existence. I didn’t know why i loved so much the nature,it was because it brings us back to our roots, to the sense of freedom that we used to have. ANd we caged ourselves in impressive homes, expensive cars, internet , indoors . When the best way to know ourselves is to go outside, experienced life. We forgot all about that. I know now why i love the sea so much, i can see the horizon in it’s most perfect form and feel free. All the problems and walls we create for ourselves fall down. True happiness can not be achieved until we understand we deserve it and expect it. DOn’t be scared to do what your heart tells you, it might be the right thing to do.
I think the most important thing in this world is love, love for each other, love for ourselves, love for the things around. FOr the first time in my life i have hope for human kind and for myself. I always thought we are doomed (just had a flashback about writing this in my dream last night,omg) but now i have hope. I will have the life i want, because it’s all about love.
Here is a quote that made me cry when i read it” Angels are love that moves.That never stops, that fights to grow, it’s beyond good or evil. Love that consumes everything , that destroys everything, that forgives everything. ANgels are made off this love , and in the same time , they are her messengers.” (hope i got it right , i translated from romanian)
SO beautiful! All we need is love and we don’t even know. ANd i don’t think only about love between a man and a woman, the absolute love, Jesus Christ told us but we didn’t want to believe it. Anne Rice wrote about it in her “The Devil Memnoch”(awesome book, a must read, best idea of religion ever, rocked my world) but i thought it was just fiction and went back to my disbelief in every one and everything. And Paulo Coelho explained it so simply that i just can’t ignore it. Didn’t expect this. I have to start believing in myself again. ANd i want to thank my ANgel for keeping me safe and for being there for me. I will never feel alone again. Now i know why i used to talk by myself, thought it was weird but made me calm somewhat, i was talking to Him.I love you 2:D
lykke li-possibility:)
There’s a Possibility,
There’s a Possibility,
All that I had was all I’m gonna get
Hmmm….
There’s a Possibility,
There’s a Possibility,
All I’m gonna get is gonna be yours then
All I’m gonna get is gonna be yours then
So tell me when you hear my heart stop
You’re the only one that knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There’s a possibility I wouldn’t know
Hmmm…..
Hmmm…
know that when you leave,
Know that when you leave,
By blood and by me, you walk like a thief,
Versuri Lykke Li – Possibility
de pe http://www.versuri.ro
By blood and by me, and I fall when you leave.
So tell me when you hear my heart stop,
You’re the only one that knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There’s a possibility I wouldn’t know
So tell me when my silence’s over
You’re the reason why I’m closed
Tell me when you hear me falling
There’s a possibility ït wouldn’t show
Hmmm…
Hmmm…
By blood and by me, and I’ll fall when you leave
By blood and by me, I follow your lead
Hmmm…
Hmmm…
Hmmm…
Hmmm…
Ahh..just beautiful:)
melancoly
I miss a walk in a deep green forest while it rains, best experience ever:)
shit, i can’t sleep:(
It’s almost 2 am and i can’t sleep. Too much coffee or to much exhaustion, don’t know what the cause is , but it’s driving me crazy. I really need to sleep. I have to study tomorrow.Don’t know what to do. Currently i am listening to depressing music on youtube.
I tried watching a movie i like(Moscow Chill with Norman Reedus). I tried watching a movie that bores me(some random movie). Nothing works.I have to many things on my head.
This song is perfect. I love it a lot.
So because off my lack of ability to sleep i’m going to have a real journal post and write what i did today.
The most significant thing is going skating with my friends.My first time, i was an ice skating virgin(it;s good to still be a virgin in some things,makes you feel young), lol…I did ok. Didn’t fall once.That shit is harder than it looks:)))..I was so scared i was going to fall all the time. I went to the ice rink from Cora. We had some discounts and i heard it was less crowded and the rumors were true.It was alright, considering that i flipped every time someone was close to me, no impact fall thank God:) .My friend Eli helped me getting started. SHe had a lot of patience for me so thank you Eli:) You are a real friend:D.It was an interesting experience.I managed to go by myself after an hour, slowly but still:D.I’m so proud of myself:) I want to give me a hug:))) I liked it a lot. Hope i will go again sometime, get the basics at least. I would love to become comfortable on ice. I love water in any form. I will post a pic after i get my camera , i forgot it at one of my friends. I am so out of this world sometimes. I should live more in real time:)) Not in my head. THis is going to be one of my things to do list.After studying. I get stressed out about anything. Oh spring come already, i will feel better after the sun comes back. I am a fire element after all in the horoscope, so i guess sun is vital for me . I always feel a great relieve after the winter passes.
I want flowers:)
I’ll end this now cause i got bored of writing too, damn.
I’ll just listen to music until i go numb.
P.S Thank you Mihu and Serby for being there at the rink learning how to skate 2. Especially Mihu for all your cheering.
It’s just random babble
I have no interest in doing anything. I have no idea why i am lacking the desire of doing something , anything. I guess it’s too much sleep. I am so used to a lot off sleep now i don’t even mind wakening up at 11 everyday. It sucks not to have something to do.I mean i have something to do but like i said i have no desire of doing it. I have to study, yeah, that’s my important schedule for about 2 weeks from now.Just study for 2 exams, only 2. And i don’t want to.All i want to do is watch funny videos on youtube and sleep.Not even watching Boondock Saints yesterday didn’t boost me up.It usually does.But not this time. I don’t even want to go out with my friends. I just want to stay at home and do nothing. I feel so out of place. I taught coming home will make me feel better, but it doesn’t. I am as depressed as ever. I guess this is the word, depressed. And the sad thing is i don’t even have a reason to be depressed. I miss my lil bro a lot, i almost cry every time i think about him, but i should be used to this by now. The thing is i don’t understand why i am so down. I just can’t put my finger on it. I should just start writing some story that i will not finish, again, of course. I always do that, start the story and don’t finish it. I’m to emotional, i have to stop that.Yeah, think ramen:)..I can’t wait to go at the Japanese restaurant i found in Cluj and eat some. That might brighten up my mood. I certainly hope so. I hate being like this.I think i should write myself some motivational messages around my room, that would be fun, something like “Study Bitch!”:))) cause i gotta pass this damn exams .
Ha i already feel better, i knew writing will make me feel better:).
And to end this random babble i just gotta say Norman Reedus is the best actor ever! Comment if you agree:))
This is my mood pic:))
Christmas favorite movies:)
1. Home alone , it’s a tradition for the Romanian networks to show it every time around CHristmas:)so i got to love it as a child and I still like watching it.
2.The Harry Potter movies(esspecialy part 1 and 2) all dough they are not about CHristmas i like to watch them in Christmas eve with my family. Great family movies and favorites of mine.I am planing to see them this Christmas eve 
3. A Christmas CArol needs no presentation:)
4.Jack Frost
5.Star wars(ep 4,5,6) they always get them on Pro Tv and i used to watch them waiting for my dad to come from Greece in Christmas time, so they remind me of Christmas. And always loved to watch them, the geeky girl that i am:)
6.Mean GIrls, cause it’s fun:)
7.Home alone 2
8.Legend
9. Fantaghiro, best children movie ever:) who doesn’t like a talking rock?
10.The Neverending Story
SO this is my Christmas post, have a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year:)
Thank you for viewing my blog:)
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